Japan: The Freak Magnet.

It's my humble opinion that living in Japan outside of the secure boundaries of the JET programme can adversely affect your mental health.

Admitedlly its not the entire JET programme- bigdaikon could tell you that. ( My friend SA.Ryan put it best when he said: "I hate that site. I hate it more than nazis").

See the largest affects to your mental health (imho) happen within the city scape. Its a lot more difficuly to get away with the kind of shit one would get away in a large city, when you are in the country side. Then coupled with the fact that the JET programme has this inbuilt support system in which JETs in big cities tend to sticfk together- you get a lot less of the rampant behaviour that the Eikaiwa teachers experience.

Of course this is all largely my own opinion and subject to over zealous generalisation- but hell- its my blog.

So- two days ago whilst on the train to Yodobashi Camera in Osaka to attempt to end my Computer Nightmare (tm) [ a story for another time], I met an interesting gentleman.

Although, I wouldnt go as far as using the word gentleman.

Im on the train- about to enjoy my 30 minute sleep while I journey into osaka. Enter Stephan. A good looking, confident and loud American/British/Jamaican man (with all three passports).

"You an ALT?!" he smarks.
And the conversation started. Largely about how much he hated his current job.

Then it took a turn.

"How the Japanese ladies treating you?"

And PING! my spider sense went off tingling. He reminded me in that minute of my previous boss Bill.

"Actually, im living with my girlfriend at the moment." I responded. Driving the fact home that I was in a serious relationship.

The conversation then degenerated into past experiences (his) and how "he got that shit outta his system the first few years he was here".

"Man- I was juggling 17 at a time at one stage."

Now Bill used to do this a lot. Tell about his conquests. I dont care. Why would you tell a stranger about that? Is that cool ? Im fucking 17 women at the same time. Yay. Look- im not perfect and ive done bad things that are vaguely related to this aswell- but not like that. And- i've never ever felt inclined to tell some doës on the train about it.

So- he continues chatting. Turns out he's getting married this year. I say- well thats nice. He adds- hes getting married to two girls. Im like. Oh- well..thats interesting - trying not to go: "You realise you're insane?".
Turns out they both "love him" and they both know about each other and they both refuse to leave. He refuses to pick- so- hes marrying both.

When enquiring about the legalities of this he responded my saying he would marry them on different passports. Im not sure if this is even legal? (or possible).

Anywho- then....if that wasnt enough- the cherry on top came.

He's a smart dude. In a lot of senses. Carries himself well- but man- eyes everywhere. So like Bill it was scary. Bill and lester. He had those "lets fuck" eyes going with EVERY female he looked at. Was a bit creepy.

So, he tells me he's writing a book about his (s)exploits. Im like- wow- i was thinking about the same thing at one time just because of the crazy experiences and the affects this country has on one.

He then tells me that its def. gonna be published along with over 100 pictures. (ie: pictures of girls he's fucked).

"Man, it's wild- you dont even have to know their names."

Quality lad clearly.

And then- the crowning moment before my brain damn near exploded and went- "nice one dude- you just etched in stone that you're a cock."

"So, whats the name of your book" I politely enquire.

"Black passengers....."

"Yellow cabs."